Monday, August 16, 2010

Handling That Pot of Crabs

In post-Bush Coolie America, where the Race to the Bottom has become the means by which the rich maintain their hegemony, one of the most common whinges we hear from the self-cannibalizing middle-class is:
"Why do (teachers, auto workers, federal employees or other current scapegoat group here) get a (pension, health insurance, raises, or other current bete noire here)?

I don't get a (pension, health insurance, raises, blah blah blah)."
Aren't you sick to death of a country full of people who think ruining others' lives will make their own better? Now, I know the ideal way of handling this is to think of it as a chance to educate the delusional worker and we are all brothers and sisters under the Boss and all that. But these people are trying to threaten our hard-won, hard-worked-for benefits. They don't give a flying fuck about us. They'd be happy as pigs in shit to see us down in the mucks of their own misery, while the real villains keep raking in profits at their expense, and they are ready to vote in any madman or woman who will do it for them. There isn't time to hold their little hannies and pat their little behinds. So don't get mad, union thugs! Get metaphoric. Try this comeback:
"Do you live in a home? Why do you get to have a home? There are thousands of people who don't have a home."
Or how about:
"Did you get here in a car? Why do you get to have a car? There are millions of people who can't afford a car."
Response is likely to take a tiresome, predictably pecuniary flavor, something like:
Because I work for a living."
So you come back with:
"Well, so do I". Maybe you should join a union."
You really can't talk sense to a crab that's desperately trying to climb out of a boiling pot over the backs of its fellow victims. But you can try to keep them from reaching out and pulling you in with them.